The Spotlight!

Its a crazy situation, especially for someone who likes to blend into the background (most of the times atleast). Questions were surely expected..."what did you do to be chosen as the so called 'brand ambassador', out of all the 2000 people?". The same question I ask myself...really "what DID I do?" Was it just a realllly random pick or was there something to the selection criteria, like 'my people' put it, or like the photographers from Chicago - "You must have done SOMEthing!". But of course, no real reasons are forthcoming, and needless to say I would have to live with being the pick of a lucky dip.

One of my friends says, I should take this up some more - and she did mean it well...but I'm thinking...Modelling!? What the...!!! Was definitely the wierdest feeling in front of that camera with instructions being ranted out - look at the crack at the door, speak to me, use your hands, eyes on camera-nose pointed to my wrist-nose on camera-eyes pointed to my wrist, pull down ur shirt to clean up your creases, turn ur head 26degrees, stand on the yellow spot, dont hunch, smile-show ur teeth-uh oh! not so much teeth...........hmph!!!! The only interesting part of the episode was being around international-award-winning (and good looking I might add;)) photographers and talking to them about their craft!
Not to forget having been paranoid due to a new zit that wouldnt go away and the sudden realisation that I dont have 'clothes'!!!! and the paunchy belly and the inability to get an appointment at the beauty salon before the shoot and the complete vanity of it all! So my heart goes out to Ash & co. who put up with this thing day in n out, adorn wall papers and talk about hair color or beautiful skin while trying hard to hush up the botox or whatever else that works hard to paralyse muscles and conceal the story each wrinkle and grey hair has to say. Its really scary what preoccupation with one's image can do to one's image and I just got a taste of that fear!

Having said all that, one does secretly enjoy the results;) Being made a landmark on the map is not something that happens everyday, whatever that map might be for....My ego just got a lovely ayurvedic massage!

But at the end of the day....like I always know...'everything is maya', leave me to my quiet corner with my PC or my book and my dirty jeans and Tee back to my reality and I will respond to your compliment with a humble thanks....

Everything happens for.....

for a reason?
arent we just making a reason out of everything that everything happens for?

for good?
by whose standards?
good for who?
does it really matter as long as it is for mine?


isnt it all a matter of choice finally?
a choice of how I choose to look at it....
and dont I choose to look at it differently each time?
sometimes with kindness and consideration for the other
sometimes with kindness and consideration for the self!