Thursday, April 06, 2006

Inadequacy...Envy...Greed...

I sometimes think I am above these petty emotions...but they crop up for the most silliest reasons and leave me feeling terribly petty!

Inadequacy.....I just cant get myself to say...'so what if I can't yet drive a car in the US...big deal!' Well, it is such a normal thing to do here, an I hate not being able to do atleast the normal stuff...forget ditching an MS course (which I dont consider normal anyways)!
Have been told it is normal to feel uncertain at first but I realise that u need to relate to the vehicle, need to visualise myself enjoying the drive, which does not seem to be there for 4 wheelers, especially when I catch myself looking longingly at a sexy Harley-Davidson and imagining me on it...YES riding it, not on the pillion!! I know that it'll take me only seconds to start a motorbike for the first time and zoom off....no sweat! Will I ever be able to get my enticer back home or is it just a stupid impractical dream....

Envy...when u hear of people carrying on very happily without u, be it at work or at home or elsewhere, a small pang of envy spreads its icy fangs slowly and lingers on. Strange! since u wanted things to go on smoothly without u in the first place!

Greed...well thats when u want to have it all! Want everything, should have the cake and eat it too and also want an icecream after that, and yeah of course a drink! Just can't stand missing out on the important stuff while I am away....as though time halts for the rest of the world, just so that I dont miss out!

time out..will visit the other deadly sins later...

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